Hi Dollies,

I haven’t posted in a long time because of the way my life has changed this past year or so. I undertook and completed a discipleship gap year, the biggest year of growth in my life. I worked through my first romantic break-up, left an old job, and started a new one. I went on mission in Fiji, made cross-cultural friendships, and shortly thereafter said goodbye to them. These endings were sad, some even ended in tears.

Therefore, in this post, I want to reflect on this different kind of grief and the lessons I’ve learned. I’d never been more joyful in my life, but the pain of yearning and regret as things ended was almost as shattering as when I lost my grandpa. He was a wonderful person to me and I loved him very much, and the things I described above were great to me too.

So if you’re mourning the end of something, I think it’s good. The more painful the mourning process is, the better indication of how fantastic that thing was. It reminded me of the uber-cheesy quote “You never know what you have, until it’s gone.” This year has taught me to treasure everything that passes by, because life is always changing and always unpredictable. 

As you travel, I think it’s unrealistic to expect to be okay with everything or get over things immediately. So mourn those good things which are now gone and give yourself some compassion, then pick yourself up, pack away the lessons you’ve learned, and move on to things that will bring even more joy.

One of my favorite quotes goes: “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens… a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance” (Ecc. 3:1, 4)

Interpret it how you will, but it reminds me to not get too caught up in the past or the future, but leave time to experience the good and the bad of right now, because sometimes the best thing to do is just take it as it comes and I don’t want to miss anything.

Take care,

Joanne